Tuesday, December 02, 2008

We Actually Like Study / Finals Week (With a SIDEBAR on the Redskins)

 . . . It's like a fifteen day weekend!  Well, not really - but we do prefer it to being in class, you basically have the entire day to the plan the way you want and don't have sit in class worrying about whether you're going to be cold called or you left the volume on your g-chat up to high while compulsively trying to type down everything the professors says because IT MIGHT SHOW UP ON THE EXAM zOMG.  Anyway, here's an incomplete list of things that we like about December and Law School.

1) Free Coffee in the Library.  According to our lawyers not paying for coffee during the school year is not a violation of the honor code (the language of the sign being ambivalent - "Please help subsidize" - what does that mean exactly? and the offense being arguably trivial; more the former) but you still shouldn't do it - BUT starting around study week the coffee is free.  And coffee bar area is a great place to meet (stressed-out and on-edge) girls. 

2) Candy in the Library.  Related to the above, but candy also makes a return to the library during finals week. Not only does the library staff put out good candy (We're talking Reeses, Milky Way, et seq.) but also Westlaw and Lexis people bring out the good stuff.  We heard that Lexis laid off a bunch of people in Charlottesville though . . . will this affect their candy quota?  Let's pray that it does not.

3) Nervous 1Ls. While we were not on the enjoyable end of this last year, we think this year it's going to be great watching the 1Ls scamper around.  We especially enjoy the "I thought Torts was so easy; I'm surprised anyone found it difficult"-type comments.  We've already given our exam advice; but never forget that you can improve your relative performance by undermining the confidence of others. 

4) FOOTBALL. Even though the Ivy League has already been decided, we've got the SEC and Big 12 championships this weekend, and some great NFL games to look forward to as well.  Will the Washington Redskins be able to wisk another playoff birth from the jaws of defeat?  Probably not - but it's always worth hoping.  

SIDEBAR:  The Washington Redskin's implosion of 2008 has rivaled that of Napoleon's Russian campaign: starting out fast and strong, and ending limping, cold, and defeated.  The sad thing?  Three of the Redskin's five losses would have been won by a halfway decent coaching staff.

OK, Team, here's how we're going to beat dem Giants: Blitz blitz blitz blitz blitz . . . argghhh how do their receivers keep getting so open! [Throws headset to the ground]

Here's a memorandum for defensive coordinator Greg Blache:  THIS IS THE BALTIMORE RAVENS FROM MADDEN '05; YOU CANNOT WIN BY BLITZING EVERY PLAY.  Every time the Washington D would pin the Giants to a third-and-medium or third-and-long last Sunday, Blache would call in the Blitz, leaving New Jersey/A's receivers wide open on slant or fade routes ---> result, first down.  

Then there is the offensive play calling.  Here's one call that's basically indicative of everything that has been done wrong all year.  With 13 minutes in the fourth quarter and the redskins trailing 20-7, the Skins got the the ball in their own territory found themselves with a fourth and less than one on their own 30 - - - and punted the ball away!  As I watched the punt unit come on, our emotions turned from disbelief to anger - from "No way is Zorn actually going to to punt the ball here" to "Dammit, do you want to win the football game or not?  There are thirteen minutes left and you're down two scores and you need to move the ball two feet. The G-men know how to control the clock; IT's NOW OR NEVER!  Needless to say, Washington went on to lose the game. 

 Washington is now at 7-5 and to win at least three of their last four to get to the playoffs; in fact, they probably will need all four the way things are shaping up because they are currently behind Tampa/Carolina, Atlanta, and (ugh) Dallas in the wild card race.  Dallas . . . .

Anyway, we digress. . .

5) No Need to Put Any Effort into Our Physical Appearance.  Actually, this is true for us all the time - but now it's true for everyone else, too!  (To be fair, we know one girl who told us that she specifically dresses well during finals because everyone else looks so terrible and then she looks really good by comparison.  Highly credited).  Also finals is a chance to catch up on our binge eating and junk food campaigns, something that we've let lapse in the semester while trying to make ourselves look presentable. 

6) When It's Over, It's Over.  And then you can leave Charlottesville and head some place where winter involves snow, electoral votes for Democrats isn't a new phenomenon, and you can drive 1 mile on the main road through town in less than 25 minutes.  Wooooo. 

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

http://charlottesville.craigslist.org/cas/942106801.html

Anonymous said...

I've always been puzzled by the request for help "subsidizing" the coffee. If you're paying for your own coffee, that's not a subsidy, so either the person who made the sign doesn't know how to use the word, or the idea is that you're paying for your own plus helping to pay for the coffee of others. Since those things cost less than a dollar, I guess it's the latter, but that means they contemplate that not everyone will pay for it. So, I think you're all good not paying.

Anonymous said...

Those disparaging remarks at the end make it highly likely that you are from the NorthEast. I'd take Cville weather -- where there are actually seasons -- any day over a permanent Siberian-style winter from October to April of any given year. Worst part of the country.

Anonymous said...

If you haven't figured out that 12(f) is from the northeast by now (he said the ivy league made for exciting football . . .)

One thing that's always surprised me is he pulls for the Redskins instead of the Bills/Giants/Jets/Pats

Anonymous said...

I am sorry I wasted my time visiting this site...won't make the same mistake twice.

Rule 12 (f) said...

Oh no! Please tell me what I can do to make your blog-reading experience more enjoyable so that you'll come back next time. Tyia.

JB4TW said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Lexis layoffs? Tragic. But, as long as it doesn't affect the sexy lexisnexis girl that works in the library, that's fine by me.

Anonymous said...

i think we all know what female made the library comments. it screams high maintenance and drives boys away